The Biggest Regret of My Life: A Candid, Heartfelt Confession by Shady Del Knight

I'm down in the dumps, dear friend, and you'll soon know why.

Years ago on my old Shady Dell Music & Memories blog, I posted

for the first time two amazing photographs. The pics, taken at

the Shady Dell in 1961, were generously shared with us

by original Dell Rat Lynn Budesheim.

The photo above shows Dell rats chit-chatting in "The Barn" - the Dell's

historic dance hall. The blonde girl on the left was identified as

Debbie the Dellette   Lynn's friend Joyce Spahr Miller.

The second shows Joyce (left) out on the floor dancing to a jukebox tune.

Note that it was common at the time for two or more girls to dance

with each other at the Dell and other venues. Wish I knew which

Dell song was playing at the moment that picture was snapped.

All these years, I never thought anyone would ever be able

to top Lynn's priceless contribution - those amazing photos

of Dellions in the dance hall. But now, thanks to a couple

more original Dell rats who recently came forward-- I can!

 TODAY, I PROUDLY 

  PREVENT PRESENT 

  MORE EXHIBITS  

 IN MY SERIES...

  SHADY DELL 

 SHOW AND TELL! 

 AND SHIRLEY, 

 THESE ARE THE 

 BEST OF ALL!  

Regrets, I've had a few

But then again too few to mention

But, sincerely folks, there is one big regret worth mentioning.

I deeply regret the day I stopped going to the Shady Dell.

 That sad day inevitably came when I graduated college, found a job in another city,

moved away from York, got married and "settled down." I spent the next 50+ years

wondering what the Dell was like in the weeks, months and years that followed my

departure, how much the look of the place and the Dell crowd had changed and

all the fun I might have had if I could have stayed on the scene a little longer.

Well, now I know. Boy, do I know!

 FOUND FOOTAGE! 

You see, just recently, two original Dell rats of the 1970s

and 1980s - Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten - reached out

and generously donated ultra-rare films they themselves

recorded inside the Dell's dance hall in the months

and years after I hung up my Dell rat ears.

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

 

The priceless Super-8 footage seen here, captured by Al and Yul on

the Dell dance floor in the early 70s, has me eating my heart out,

knowing (and especially seeing) all that I missed!

(early 1970s) typical Friday night crowd

at the Shady Dell - film courtesy of

Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

I always knew I had lousy timing, and the films shot by

Dell rats Al and Yul are a brutal reminder that-- "I been

in the right place, but it must have been the wrong time."

Here's my story, it's sad but true

It's about a girl that I never knew

dancing Dellette of the post-Shady Del Knight era

- film courtesy of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

The above clip is a painful reminder that a future Mrs. Shady

might have been waiting for me right there on the Dell

dance floor. But, alas, I was gone, retired, washed up.

Our epic romance was simply not meant to be!

(10 second pause while Shady sobs)

Having regained my composure, allow me to show you

the next amazing film clip contributed by new friends

of the Dell Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten.

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

As you might have noticed by now, soon after I left the Shady Dell

for good, the demographics at my favorite hangout suddenly

skyrocketed to 99% female! Oh, the pain... the pain!

"Wall-to-Wall Dellettes!"  - film courtesy

of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

But wait -- there's more!  I have proof that the 1980s brought

even greater, more drastic changes to the Shady Dell dance hall.

The rare footage you are about to see, recorded by Al and Yul

and their candid cameras, shows us that a movie screen was

installed, a stage was erected and live rock bands played

to standing-room-only crowds of boisterous Dellettes!

live band performs in Dell "barn" in May, 1987

- film courtesy of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

If only I had continued on as a Dell rat one more night,

I would have witnessed this exciting all-Dellette

"Dance Contest." I'll never forgive myself

for flying the coop prematurely!

 

"Oldies Night" dance contest held in June 1971,

the night after I stopped going to the Dell! -

film courtesy of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten  

Yessum, in the years after I turned in my Dell Rat badge,

it was "anything goes" in the old barn.  Al, Yul and their

trusty Super-8 cams gathered graphic visual proof

that some mighty strange characters frequented

the joint and bizarre antics abounded.

And the man at the back said "Everyone attack"

and it turned into a ballroom blitz! - film

courtesy of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

Shirley the news headlines will read "Dell Alum Makes Good"

once the MSM get their hands on this rare footage shot by Al

and Yul. It shows Debbie the Dellette, the most popular girl

ever to attend our dear old alma mater, all grown up and

performing with her dance troupe in The Barn. Yessum,

the cameras were rolling on "Homecoming Night" as

Debbie & The Dellettes brought their "Can't Wait

For The Weekend To Begin" tour back to

York, PA, and the Shady Dell!

Debbie & The Dellettes "Can't Wait For The

Weekend To Begin" National Tour Homecoming -

film courtesy of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

Clearly, the film footage you are watching, secretly collected

by Dell rats Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten... locked away

in a vault for decades and made public for the first time

today exclusively here at Shady's Place... shows us

the shocking truth about the post-Shady Dell.

Jan & Dean's hit record "Surf City" boasted

"2 girls for every boy." Shucks, that's nothing!

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

These mind-boggling home-away-from-home movies

taken by Al and Yul reveal that the girl-boy ratio at

the Dell in the 70s and 80s was "a million to one!"

"The Great Dellette Invasion" of the early 70s

- film courtesy of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

Rats! Woe is me! Why was I in such a hurry

to leave the Dell behind and "grow up"?

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

 As these rare flicks donated by Al and Yul indicate,

I missed a heck of a lot when I left York to begin

my so-called "adult life" in another city!

The Shady Dell dance hall, totally unrecognizable

in the years after I departed - film courtesy

 of Al B. Dern and Yul B. Smitten

And there you have it, my friends. The biggest regret

of my life is that I left the Shady Dell too soon.

I wasn't there to witness my old hangout's incredible early 1970s transformation...

...and the even more stunning metamorphosis that followed in the 80s.

I've been kicking myself ever since Dell rats Al and Yul sent me

their film reel offering indisputable proof of a Shady Dell

most of us "old timers" never even knew existed...

...a swinging underground scene overrun by robo-babes!

Now, here I sit, five decades later, with tears in my eyes...

wondering "what if?" and feeling sorry, not so much for myself...

but for all those young women who never had the chance to meet

and, more importantly, to date and marry Shady Del Knight.

Thanks for hearing me out, dear friend. In parting, I'd like to wish you a

MERRY CHRISTMAS! 

HAPPY HALLOWEEN! 

A SUPER GROOVY
ST. SWITHUN'S DAY!

AND, MOST OF ALL, A...

 

 HAPPY 

 APRIL FOOLS' DAY! 

Helen Ettline - Every Dell Rat's Mom: He's Gone to Cha Cha Cha Up On The Roof

 Shady Dell owner Helen Ettline 

 didn't have any children of her own. 

 In a way, we were all her kids 

 and she was our mom. 

Clearly Helen & John

loved kids. Why else

would they have

put up with the

aggravation all

those years?

The Ettlines

believed in kids.

They enjoyed

counseling and

helping kids.

The pictures above and below remind me ever so much of Helen's snack bar

and the jukebox in the adjoining room where rows of diner booths were located.

To remember and honor

Helen on Mother's Day,

I picked four songs that

I think she would enjoy.

Helen, these are for you.

 LITTLE ANTHONY 

 AND THE IMPERIALS 

Over the years, on Helen's special days, I have often played

"Two People In The World," by Little Anthony And The Imperials.

I refer to the ballad as "Helen's Song" because I remember it

being played so many times on the snack bar jukebox. 

Today, as we honor Helen on Mother's Day, I'd like to spin another

Little Anthony classic. From the fall of 1964, here is the group's

top 20 comeback hit, a song written by Teddy Randazzo and

Bobby Weinstein. Little Anthony And The Imperials sing--

"I'm On The Outside (Looking In)."

"I'm On The Outside (Looking In)" - Little Anthony And The Imperials

(Sept./Oct. 1964, highest chart pos. #15 Hot 100 & R&B/#20 Cash Box) 

 THE DRIFTERS 

"The Second Drifters" is the name given in 1958 to the new lineup

of the veteran doo-wop/R&B/Soul group. In 1961, The Drifters

got another makeover when Rudy Lewis joined as lead singer.

Lewis led the group on a string of polished, sophisticated, orchestrated hits

of the pre-Beatles early 60s. I think Helen would enjoy this song, one of the

group's biggest successes of the period. Written by the Brill Building team

of Gerry Goffin and Carole King, the song reminds city dwellers that

they can escape the hustle and bustle of life on the street and

shed their cares and woes  -- "Up On The Roof."

"Up On The Roof" - The Drifters

(Dec. 1962/Jan. 1963, highest chart pos.

#4 R&B/#5 Hot 100/#6 Cash Box)

 THE CHANTELS 

Up next, the angelic harmonies of The Chantels, the pioneering Bronx-

based African-American R&B girl group of the 50s led by Arlene Smith. 

The Chantels gained their first charting record in the fall of 1957 with

 a song written by Arlene. The single made a dent in the pop chart

but, oddly, didn't show up on the R&B survey. Listen now to

this glorious ballad, one of The Chantels' best recordings

and a classic of the genre -- "He's Gone." 

"He's Gone" - The Chantels

(Oct. 1957, highest chart pos. #71 Hot 100)

 SAM COOKE 

To complete this year's Mother's Day song serenade for Helen,

here's singer/songwriter Sam Cooke with one of his biggest R&B hits. 

It's a song Sam wrote about the cha-cha-cha, a Cuban dance that gained
widespread popularity in America in the late 50s. Released at the start
of 1959, Sam's single reached #2 on the R&B chart and made a run
at the top 30 on the pop side. The young folks in the audience were
chewing up a storm as Sam appeared on Dick Clark's Saturday Night
Beechnut Show and declared-- "Everybody Likes to Cha Cha Cha!"

"Everybody Likes To Cha Cha Cha" - Sam Cooke

(Mar. thru May 1959, highest chart pos. #2 R&B,

#31 Hot 100, performance on Mar. 14, 1959, ep.

of Dick Cark's Saturday Night Beechnut Show) 

 Happy Mother's Day, Helen! 

 We love you and miss you! 

E! (as in Ettline) True Shady Dell Story

It's Father's Day...

time to honor 

JOHN ETTLINE

"Every Dell Rat's Dad."

John didn't have kids of his own but, as every Dell rat knows,

he was a genuine father figure and would have made a great dad.

Hi, friends!  Dell Rat Tom back with

you today to bring you a very special

Father's Day tribute to John Ettline.

 Instead of posting Paul Petersen's

"My Dad" song as I have done on

this occasion the last several years,

 I proudly present a Shady's Place

exclusive. My good friend and

contributing editor Jim Sieling

has returned to share pictures,

memories and little known

facts about John Ettline's

life and death.

As Jim begins his story below, you might be confused at first, as was I.

Turns out, Shady Dell owner John Ettline's father was also named 

John, and John's mother was named Helen, the same name as

the woman John married, our dear Helen of the Dell.

Jim and Nancy Sieling

Above is a picture of our friend Jim and his wife Nancy, one of

John Ettline's nieces.  Over the years, Jim and Nancy have made

numerous significant contributions to my Shady Dell related blogs,

and I'll be forever grateful to them. In this Father's Day tribute

to John, you will see never before before published pictures

of Jim and Nancy and get to know them and other

members of our Shady Dell family.

I'm sure you've heard of the E! True Hollywood Story.

For Dell rats, old and new, here now is the

E! (as in Ettline) True Shady Dell Story

as told by our good friend Jim Sieling.

"MY TRUE STORY" - THE JIVE FIVE

JIM SIELING: Strange fact - Shady Dell owner John Ettline’s father

was also named John (John Loid Ettline), and John's grandfather 

and great grandfather were named John as well! 

Helen Louise Pape & John Loid Ettline

(Note father's resemblance to "our" John!)

 The John Loid Ettline family lived on Park St. in York. He and his

wife Helen Louise Pape had eight children - four boys and four girls.

 John Frederick Ettline, who would one day become both famous

and infamous as the owner of The Shady Dell, was the oldest

of the eight. As the parents lived on Park St. until they died,

I assume John F received all his grade school education

in York and graduated from William Penn High School.

He served in the Army in the 2nd World War in

 Europe and I found a purple heart in Nancy’s

memorabilia which I assume is his. 

I first met John in about 1950 (plus or minus). My mother,

who grew up in Glen Rock, somehow got to know the

Ettlines of York and went out with one of the Ettline

boys a couple of times in the 1930’s.

SHADY DELL CIRCA LATE 1920S/EARLY 30S

 I remember my father and mother taking me over to see this (I think new or

maybe remodeled) place that had opened up (or about to be opened up)

called The Shady Dell and being shown around by the owner. I was

around 8 years old at the time and don’t remember much but I do

recall the big house and outside all these brightly colored lights

strung out between the house and trees. I remember there were

tables outside under the lights and a place to dance. Really neat. 

"PARTY LIGHTS" - CLAUDINE CLARK 

Who would have thought that 20 odd years later

I would marry the Dell owner’s niece?

In 1959, I got to know a new girl, age 16,

who had just moved into my neighborhood.

Nancy Eppley - age 16, 1959

John Ettline's niece 

 

She was the daughter of Louise Ettline Eppley,

one of John’s sisters. 

Jim Sieling - age 17, 1959

I was hooked. Nancy stole my heart that summer

and, after 13 years of being friends, we were married. 

"TO THE AISLE" - THE FIVE SATINS 

(above & below) Jim and Nancy Sieling

In the Ettline family, I believe the closest contact to the

Shady Dell, via her Uncle John, was Nancy.

 For whatever reason there was a strong bond between them. 

 Before our marriage, Nancy would often visit with John and help out.

VIEW OF DELL FROM STARCROSS ROAD WITH

SHADY DELL ROAD SIGN VISIBLE (2018)

 Did you know that John was always worried that the “Dell Rats”

(not his words) would leave the street messy, and every morning

he would go out picking up any litter left on the street from

the night before? Nancy fondly remembered going out

with John in his red Jeep picking up trash. 

In the basement of the house there were a room or two where John

and Helen would let girls that were being abused stay over in safety. 

(ABOVE AND BELOW) SHADY DELL BASEMENT (2010)

After John’s death, Nancy told me about the rooms in the basement

for the women’s protection while showing them to me.

They were very well kept and clean. 

I'd like to insert an important

tidbit at this point, Jim.

 Folks, if what Jim just reported is true,

then it is possible that John and Helen

housed runaway women and girls in

their basement as well as in the third

floor attic, perhaps both places at once!

In 2008, Nancy's cousin, Shirley Dreyer,

another of John's nieces whom, as Jim

informs us, is "the unofficial historian

of the Ettline family," contacted me

with the following revelations:

 

SHIRLEY DREYER:  Did you every wonder why he (John)

always carried around the "billyclub"? My father told me years

after I was married and I was shocked to learn the reason.

It seems Uncle John also housed battered women in his home. 

SHADY DELL'S 3RD FLOOR ATTIC (2012)

SHIRLEY DREYER: There was a 3rd floor in his home and that is where they

stayed until they could find other shelter. So you might say it was, most likely,

the first home in York prior to Access York and other agencies available to

 women who needed to get away from their abuser. Daddy said he did not

tell me when I was younger because it was a possibility that word would

get out to the wrong people and he wanted to protect his brother.

So I guess that is at least one of the reasons for the "billyclub".

JIM SIELING: It is pure speculation on my part, but this is what I suspect

may have occurred: John & Helen saw the need to help young girls/women

in need from abuse. At first, the natural solution would have been up in the

attic and it may have been used for a time. It was a nice spacious solution.

SHADY DELL'S 3RD FLOOR ATTIC (2012) 

However, it may not have been finished off and there likely

was no heat in the attic. The attic was probably very cold

in the winter, particularly if it was not insulated.

 

(ABOVE AND BELOW) DIFFERENT ANGLES OF DELL ATTIC (2012) 

 In the summer, the attic was probably unbearably hot with the heat just

radiating down from the roof. Certainly no air conditioning was available

(and a window unit, if available, would have been a big clue that someone

was living there). Anyway, it makes sense to me that at some point

they moved their women support area to the basement.

 Please remember, John’s seven younger siblings saw him as an

enigma - he kept his affairs private and they knew little about him.

When I married into the Ettline family, I soon learned that John

was a little aloof from the rest of his siblings and did not

attend many of the family events. (He was probably

too busy running the Dell – I don’t think

he had any backup). 

The big question among family members was

whether John and Helen were actually married.

(I’ll bet John liked that they didn’t even know

if he was married or not. They must have had

a private wedding). Note: we did discover

their marriage certificate after his death. 

Also, I do not know if you as a Dell Rat knew that the Ettlines were pack rats.

When cleanup started after John’s death, it was impossible to get to the 2nd

floor without digging our way up the stairs, let alone getting up to the attic.

Perhaps the clutter only happened after Helen’s death but, at the very

least, I suspect they would have used the attic for storage way before.

STAIRS LEADING DOWN FROM 3RD TO 2ND FLOOR (2012) 

 When John died all upstairs rooms, stairs, and hallways were packed solid.

The stored ‘stuff’ probably started in the attic and worked it’s way down

to the second floor. At some point John was sleeping on the first floor –

no easy access to the 2nd floor. (I do remember the family cleaning

 crew remarking that no Ettline family member had ever been on

the 2nd or 3rd floor before}. After Helen died, Louise Eppley,

John’s sister, would help out in the snack bar. When John

died, she was the executor of his estate.  

JOHN ETTLINE

I believe John came to stay with Nancy and our family in the spring of 1992.

He had been living by himself at the Dell, was out checking for mail or the

paper, and was sideswiped by a car, knocking him over and hurting a leg.

There was never any legal action taken, but I do not know if it was a

hit and run or not. After getting out of the hospital or rehab, he stayed

at our house until he could walk better. Nancy gave him a quota of a

certain number of daily laps he had to take around the dining room

table to exercise the leg and keep him moving. 

Jim, pardon me for interrupting you again,

but I need to say that this part of your story

is disturbing and comes as a shock, not only

to me but, I'm sure, to other Dell rats as well. 

It makes me sad to realize that elderly John

 Ettline, a man we admired so much, was

struck by a car outside the Dell and sent

to the hospital. This is the first time I am

hearing about the incident. Now that you

have given us a clearer picture of the last

years of John's life... it is upsetting to

know how difficult they were for him.

John spent most of his final years alone, without Helen,

and having to deal with rowdy, disrespectful troublemakers

that hung out at the Dell during that period. Then, to top it off, 

he was hit by a car and taken out of his home for treatment

and rehab. From what I gather, he never returned to the Dell,

the place he loved, the place he fashioned for generations

of young people to enjoy. John was a great man who 

spent his life helping and bringing happiness

to others. He deserved better. 

 JIM SIELING: At the time John was here at our house recuperating,

our oldest son was a senior in high school. He and his younger brother

spent a lot of time talking (mostly listening) to John. They were

enthralled by the stories he had to tell. Our oldest son had a

high school graduation party here in our barn, and John was

certainly in his element greeting everyone as they arrived.

(at right --

Louise Ettline Eppley,

John's sister and

Nancy's mother)

As spring ended and John was

in pretty good shape, he moved

out to live with his sister Louise.

(I’m afraid he always felt like

he was imposing here and

didn’t feel comfortable).

 Louise didn’t nag him to stay

active and he died peacefully

in his sleep in 1993 at her house.

(Louise died in February, 2012.)

John’s memorial service was held at his gravesite and someone in his family

was given a letter from one of “The Dellions” who did not want to speak

at the service. Nancy asked me to read it which I did. The original letter

was written in long hand on the front and back of an 8 1/2” sheet of paper.

 Concerned that I might have trouble reading the handwriting out loud,

I typed it out for easier reading. I am amazed to discover that Nancy

had saved a copy of both the original and my typewritten version.

Nancy Sieling

(faithful friend of The Dell)

Nancy died on September 30, 2020, a month after she

had open heart surgery followed by a major stroke.  

Jim, I know I speak for all the readers when

I express to you how sorry I am for your loss.

 Nancy was a genuine friend who was very

generous to me over the years. She donated

Dell related pictures and memorabilia for

me to share on my old Shady Dell blog,

material that I continue to use here at

Shady's Place.  I will always remember

her kindness. Nancy's death serves as a

reminder of how important is for us to

get our cherished Dell memories sorted

out and published while there's still time.

The tribute to John written by anonymous

"Dellions" and read at John's service, is priceless. 

There, in that letter, is what I have been saying all along, what I have been

expressing to readers over the last 14 years. It is proof in black and white

that John Ettline was absolutely revered by the young people who knew

him, thousands of teenagers in York and neighboring counties who made

John's Shady Dell their home away from home in the mid twentieth century.

Thank you very much, Jim Sieling, for sharing boyhood memories

of your first visit to the Dell and meeting John Ettline more than

70 years ago, along with the touching story of how you met,

fell in love with and married Nancy, the Dell owner's niece.

 The facts, anecdotes and pictures you contributed for this special

Father's Day salute are valuable pieces of the puzzle. They help

 connect the dots, fill in the blanks and shine light on mysteries

surrounding John & Helen and their Shady Dell. Some of

your disclosures are troubling and heartbreaking but,

because they are part of the Dell's long, rich and

 colorful history, they needed to be told.

  You are a friend of the Dell and a friend of Shady's Place,

Jim, and your contributions are greatly appreciated.

Jim & Nancy - wedding day, 1972

In closing, I would like to dedicate this song

to you and Nancy and to Helen and John.

LOOK HOMEWARD ANGEL - THE MONARCHS 

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY, JOHN.

WE LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU!