Jess Parker's Primeval Platterpus: Here it Comes Again... that Wild Thing!

(COLD OPEN)

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

 

"Neanderthal Man" - Hotlegs

(Sept./Oct. 1970, highest chart pos.

#20 Cash Box/#22 Hot 100)

Kicking-off the show with a primeval platter that time forgot, that was the throwback

sound of "Neanderthal Man," a top 20 single in the fall of 1970 by the one-hit-wonder

British rock trio Hotlegs. The act consisted of Eric Stewart, founding member of

The Mindbenders, Kevin Godley and Lol Creme. The three were later joined by

Graham Gouldman to form the 70s art rock band 10cc. In the 80s Kev and

Lol became the rock duo known as Godley & Creme.

How do. Tally ho

and all that rot.

I'm Jess Parker

from the British

science-fiction

television series

Primeval.

As the young but efficient field coordinator at the ARC (Anomaly Research Centre),

I'm responsible for coordinating a team that tracks down and captures all sorts

of scary prehistoric and futuristic creatures that burst through anomalies...

 4th dimension rifts in time and space, and terrorize and attack humans.

 Well, we can't have that, now can we? 

What do I do in

my spare time?

Well, let's see...

my hobbies

include buying

shoes, wearing

shoes, showing off

my shoes, dressing

in colorful, sexy,

brainiac-techie

style outfits

and devouring

romantic novels.

Did I mention

shoes? 

  

  

Gents say I'm hot and don't even know it, which

makes me even hotter. While I might be a dish...

I'm also clever, resourceful and bloody good at my job. 

Almost forgot. My job description

also includes delivering clever,

snappy one-liner comebacks to

my co-workers and superiors.

Recently I faced court martial

for firing off cheeky zingers, 

for being a criminally cute

nerd girl and for stealing

way too many scenes. 

Deemed too pretty for prison, I am out on a work release

program that allows me to sit at my overwatch station

and play musty, moldy musical memories as member

of The Shady Bunch DJ squadron on S-P-M-M.

 

Today I'm giving you a sneak peek

at my new show. Just call me your

Primeval Platterpus

because I play monster platters -

killer sounds from the distant past. 

The records I'll be

playing, mainly the

groovy sounds from

the 1960s, 70s and

80s, might seem

like dinosaurs to

younger ears...

but to Boomers,

they're the latest

and the greatest.

I've opened a portal to the past, a period eons ago when great music ruled.

 Come with me now. Let's go there. It's yesterday once more!

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW! 

Wait a sec. My team just rang me up on the radio and told me they're under attack

by a deadly swarm of futurebeetles. These beetles don't want to hold your hand.

They want to eat it, along with your other body parts. I've discovered a good

way to keep the creatures at bay is to bombard them with the loud sound

of The Ramones' punk classic "Blitzkrieg Bop" - "Hey! Ho! Let's go!" 

"Blitzkrieg Bop" - The Ramones

(July 1976 single from Apr. 1976 album Ramones)

From New York, NY, those were the Ramones, considered by many to be the first

true punk rock band, and "Blitzkrieg Bop," their 1976 debut single and first song

on their debut self-titled album. Although it failed to chart, "Blitzkrieg Bop"

ranks high on Rolling Stone's list of The 500 Greatest Songs of All Time

and was named VH1's 25th Greatest Hard Rock Song of All Time.

 Uh-oh!  My team has just spotted a T-Rex

munching a Mini Cooper at Piccadilly Circus.

  

Meanwhile, I can report a T. Rex sighting of my own. This

T. Rex won't batter and bruise your Buick. It'll entertain you. 

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

It's the English glam rock band led by singer, songwriter and guitarist

Marc Bolan, and here they are on Top Of The Pops in 1971 doing

their biggest hit and signature song "Bang A Gong (Get It On)."

"Bang A Gong (Get It On)" - T. Rex

(Feb./Mar. 1972, highest chart pos. #10 Hot 100/#12 Cash Box,

performance on July 8, 1971, ep. of Top Of The Pops)

With his friend Elton John on keyboards, that was Marc Bolan and

his British glam rock band T. Rex doing "Bang A Gong (Get It On),"

a single that topped the UK chart and went top 10 stateside.

Sadly... Marc died five years later in a car crash. 

If you're just tuning in...

I'm Jess Parker, your

Primeval

Platterpus

seated here at my dispatcher

console in London and multi-

tasking... coordinating my

field team as they battle

the beasts and, at the

same time, spinning

old gold wax in this

 sneak preview of my

new radio program.

CLICK TO START

THE VIDEO NOW!

I'm transmitting on S-P-M-M, where we go hunting for the groovy songs

of the past and bring 'em back alive. Bollocks, here it comes again...

that feeling... that feeling of being surrounded by creatures from

the year zero hell bent on destroying the human race in the 21st

century. The Fortunes have further details about our calamity!

"Here It Comes Again" - The Fortunes

(Nov./Dec. 1965, highest chart pos. #27 Hot 100/#37 Cash Box)

You just heard the groovy beat and heavenly harmony of The Fortunes doing

"Here It Comes Again," a top 30 hit for the British group in the fall of 1965. 

Jess Parker here on S-P-M-M Jurassisonic Radio... dealing with dinos

and directing my troops whilst playing primeval platters aplenty.

I happen to know of a chap who could help our team tame

the T-rex and Triceratops - Quinn the Eskimo! Let's go

through the time portal back to the year 1968.

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Here now is Manfred Mann and his popular Brit band

to tell us all about-- "The Mighty Quinn!"

"The Mighty Quinn (Quinn The Eskimo)" - Manfred Mann

(Mar./Apr. 1968, highest chart pos. #4 Cash Box/#10 Hot 100)

"You'll not see nothing like the Mighty Quinn." That was the Manfred Mann

band surrounded by go-go dancers doing their cover of "The Mighty Quinn

(Quinn The Eskimo)," a folk-rock song written by Bob Dylan

and a top 5 hit for the Brit boys in the spring of '68. 

CLICK TO START

THE VIDEO NOW!

Up next, here's Reg Presley and

his band The Troggs with a

genuine monster-- their

international hit-- 

"Wild Thing!"

"Wild Thing" - The Troggs

(July/Aug. 1966, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100 & Cash Box)

You just heard "Wild Thing," a colossal fossil penned by American

songwriter Chip Taylor and unleashed upon the world by the

British rock quartet The Troggs. "Wild Thing" ripped up

the chart in the summer of '66 reaching #1 in the U.S.

and in New Zealand. Notable covers were recorded

by Jimi Hendrix, Senator Bobby and Sam Kinison. 

That's all for now. I hope you enjoyed

the dusty discs and rusty relics I played

in this sneak preview of my new show

Primeval Platterpus

coming soon to S-P-M-M Retro Radio...

the station with personality.

 As I mentioned in my profile at the top of the show, I've got

a passion for fashion. If one of those creatures decides to

have me for lunch, I'm going out in style. With that in

mind, I've got one last primeval platter for you.

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

Here's David Bowie to play us off with his top 5 UK hit "Fashion,"

and stay tuned on the B side of news for Wolfman Jack who'll

be here to spin a stack of American hot wax on S-P-M-M.

Now this is Jess Parker urging you to do your beast

and I'll see you next time on Primeval Platterpus!

"Fashion" - David Bowie

{Dec. 1980/Jan. 1981, highest chart pos. #5 UK,

#70 Hot 100/#79 Cash Box from Sept. 1980 album

Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps)}