The 1600 Club Meet the Supremes of Pennsylvania Ave. Vol. 1: Mellie For President - "Built, Back and Better!"

COLD OPEN:

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

"Elected" - Alice Cooper

(Sept. to Nov. 1972, highest chart pos. #18 Cash Box/#26 Hot 100,

#4 UK/#3 Germany & Austria/#5 Netherlands)       

Hello, my fellow Americans!

I'm Mellie Grant. 

As you might recall from my previous appearance at Shady's Place

at the end of 2022, I am the former First Lady of these great

United States of America on the political thriller

television series Scandal.

Think I look like Jessica Whitly, Malcolm's mom on Prodigal Son?

  

or Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer? Yeah, I get that a lot.

 

I called this news conference

in order to put to rest a silly,

unsubstantiated rumor that

has been floating around -

a false story that has been

reported by the fake news

media for weeks now.

Today, I am announcing to this

great nation of ours that, contrary

to what you might have heard

through the gossipy grapevine,

I am not..... I repeat not.....

throwing my hat in the ring

and humbly asking for your

vote and the opportunity to

proudly serve you, the great

American people, as your next

President of the United States.

God bless America! 

If nominated, I will not run.

If elected, I will not serve. 

Now that I've cleared that up, just for fun, just to hear

how it sounds... let me shout it from the rooftops: 

"Mellie for President 2024...

and God bless America!" 

To those silly skeptics who still think I'm a candidate

to become the next leader of the free world...

I call bullcrap!

Goodness, I'll be much too busy serving my country

as a Shady Bunch DJ on S-P-M-M Retrosonic Radio.

That said, I welcome you to our new show

  The 1600 Club:

Meet the Supremes

of Pennsylvania Avenue. 

Joining me in hosting the show will be three other

White House Wonder Women.

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

As powerful, influential females in orbit around

the President in Washington, D.C., we like to think of

ourselves as The Supremes of Pennsylvania Avenue.

"Reflections" - Diana Ross And The Supremes

(Aug./Sept. 1967, highest chart position

#2 Hot 100 & Cash Box/#4 R&B)

You just heard from the stars of our series, the featured artists of

  The 1600 Club

Diana Ross And The Supremes, performing their

psychedelic pop styled 1967 hit "Reflections."

My notes indicate that the Supremes' single peaked at #2

on the pop chart, denied the top spot two weeks in a row

by the Bobbie Gentry smash "Ode To Billie Joe."

Now, meet the other

White House 

Wonder Women

beginning with the home-

wrecking hussy who came

between me and my (ex)

husband Fitz, the sitting

President who preferred

to lie in bed with her.

That's right, my fellow

Americans. I admit that

I'm not a happy camper

since I lost my hubby

to his secret squeeze,

his mistress, his girl

on the side (and very

often on her back).

The tramp's name

is Olivia Pope.

You see, my cheating, skirt-chasing ex-hubby, The President, is always

hooking up with that conniving witch. He even ditched me last Christmas

and spent the holidays with his Ho Ho Ho! They do it right there in on

his desk in the Oval Office, in hotels, on trains and boat and planes,

at the top of the Washington Monument, in Abe's lap at the

Lincoln Memorial --  you name it. 

I hate to go on and on about it, but

they're like a couple of bunny rabbits

those two, and I'm sick and tired of it!

Finally, I had enough and issued an

old tomato. I said to him, "make up

your mind, bucko...do you want me

and your political career... or her?"

He chose her.

So yeah, if you want the truth,

the break up of my marriage

has left me an angry, bitter

and frustrated former

First Lady.

 But, you know what?

They say the best revenge

is massive success, and I'll

have it the day I become

President of these

great United States

of God Bless America

 

the best darned DJ on

the Shady Bunch roster. 

Hello, I'm Olivia Pope...

former media relations consultant to President Fitzgerald Grant III

(Mellie's ex) on Scandal. Along with media relations, Fitz

and I regularly engage in relations of another kind.

In addition to the places Mellie mentioned, we do it the East Wing,

the West Wing, the White House lawn, on Air Force One, in the

Goodyear Blimp and snap, on the 50-yard line of Fed-Ex-Field.

Long story short... Fitz can't get enough of this funky stuff. 

To set the mood, Scandal boasts the best music soundtrack

since Cop Rock, and here on our radio series

  The 1600 Club

...I'll play some of the songs you'll hear on the TV show.

I'm talkin' about classic R&B, funk and sophisticated soul. 

CLICK TO START

THE VIDEO NOW! 

The song you're hearing

right now is all about that

Harper Valley hypocrite

Mellie Grant. I know why

she married Fitz, a politician

on track to become President.

Her plan was to ride his coat-

tails to the White House and

launch her own political

career. That Karen's in it

for fame, power and

"For The Love

Of Money!"

"For The Love Of Money (Give It To Me)" - Jay-Z vs The O'Jays 

Boogie Hill Faders Remix (Feb. 2020)

Hola! Me llamo Isabel Pardo...

I am White House Deputy Chief of Staff on the

political thriller drama TV series Designated Survivor. 

I'm the girlfriend of the Vice President-elect of the United States

Aaron Shore, no relation to Shady Bunch DJ Alan Shore...

but just as much of a horn-dog. 

START VIDEO NOW! 

 That's right. As in Mellie Grant's

case - having to put up with her

lowdown cheating husband,

the President, I caught my

man steppin' out and doggin'

around. Now I'm stuck in the

middle of a messy love triangle.

Know what? I'm gonna kick

"hammerin' Hank" Aaron to

the curb, and I've got the

perfect Santana song to

sing as I send him packing.

"You Just Don't Care" and

now, mi amigo, neither do I. 

"You Just Don't Care" - Santana

(from Aug. 1969 album Santana)

Hello, I'm

Emily Rhodes

...former Chief of Staff and

current Special Advisor to the

President of the United States

Kiefer Sutherland Tom Kirkman,

on the political thriller drama TV

series Designated Survivor. Okay,

I confess that I made a mistake

when I slept with Isabel's boy toy,

Vice President-elect Aaron Shore.

I never intended for it to go as far as it did. See, we were working together

late one night and one thing led to another and yada yada yada.

 It blew up when Isabel found us nekked together in the Rose Garden.

 Now, Aaron's practically

down on his knees

begging Izzy to take

him back... and I'm

finding it hard to

say goodbye. 

CLICK TO

START THE

VIDEO NOW! 

Foxes And Fossils explain it

in their Linda Ronstadt

cover of Evie Sands'--

"I Can't Let Go!" 

"(I) Can't Let Go" - Evie Sands/Hollies cover

by Foxes And Fossils (Aug. 2013) 

I hear you, Emily, but I'm

still hella mad. I'm calling

you out as a skank, and

your crocodile tears

don't mean a thing.

I'm dedicating this

next song to you

and to that cheatin',

mistreatin' dawg

Aaron who came

crawling back to

me with his tail

between his legs.

 

In June, 1961... a four

member girl group called

The Sweethearts released

"Sorry Daddy," an answer

song to "Daddy's Home,"

a major hit that year for

the R&B/doo-wop group

Shep & The Limelites.

The Sweethearts song

didn't give Daddy the

answer he hoped for: 

Daddy, momma is glad

That you've come back home,

But I'm sorry, pretty daddy,

But you've waited too long.

Sorry daddy, sorry daddy, I'm gone. 

The Sweethearts' single missed the chart, but the song was

resurrected 60 years later by Latina soul queen Monica Rocha

backed by The Notations, a veteran soul group from Chicago.

 

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW! 

Singing this long lost answer song written by Shep Sheppard,

here are Monica and The Notations-- "Sorry Daddy." 

"Sorry Daddy" - The Notations feat. Monica Rocha

(June 2020)

Izzy, I don't see why you've got your knickers in a bunch.

The fact that I slept with your precious Aaron is no big deal. 

It's all the nasty stuff we did while we were still awake

that should bother you. See what I did there?

 

Besides, Aaron's back with you now

and I'm out in the cold on my own.

 I don't expect us to be besties, but

we need to learn to work together

at the White House for the good of

the country. You need to understand

how hard it is working side by side

with Aaron every day and wanting

to spend nights with him like you do. 

I've got another The Supremes chart-

topper that speaks to the situation. 

START VIDEO NOW! 

The song tells the truth about the

way that I feel whenever handsome,

charismatic Aaron walks in the

room-- "I Hear A Symphony!" 

"I Hear A Symphony - The Supremes

(Oct./Nov. 1965, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100,

#1 Cash Box/#2 R&B/#1 Canada)

Boohoo, Emily.  No one cares about your problems.  Let's refocus on mine.

You say you hear a symphony?  I've got a symphony for you, sister!

For too long, I've been nothing but eye candy - window dressing

in this boys' club... unappreciated and underestimated.

 I caught hubby Fitz lying down on the job, literally...

and the American people deserve better.

So c'mon America.  Get with the program. 

Anything a mortal man can do, Mellie can do better!

Put another man in the White House and you're

asking for a-- "Symphony of Destruction!"

"Symphony of Destruction" - Megadeth

guitar cover by nacoco music (March 2024)

To top it off, now that she knows I'm running for president,

that "rhymes with witch" Olivia Pope is doing everything

in her power to prevent me from winning the election.

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW! 

She's telling everyone I'm "out of touch" with the issues

and the needs of the average American, and since we're

almost "out of time," here are Daryl Hall And John Oates!

"Out Of Touch" - Daryl Hall And John Oates

(Oct. thru Dec. 1984, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100,

#3 Cash Box/#1 U.S. Dance Club)

 

So, to review, The 1600 Club revolves around four powerful

women in a circle around two powerful men forming two

love triangles. To complete the equation... there are

zero squares among us.

Thanks for joining us

today for the debut of 

The 1600 Club.

We'll be back with more

great tunes and more

relationship drama

in the next edition

coming soon.

I suppose you could say that all four Wonder Women of the White House

are riding on a "Love Rollercoaster," and to play us off, here's the

funk band that recorded the song and made it famous.

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW!

They're the Ohio Players doing one of their biggest hits, a single that reached

#1 at the start of 1976. Now for my arch rival Mellie Grant, Isabel Pardo

and Emily Rhodes, I'm Olivia Pope saying so long and reminding you -

please... don't do anything we wouldn't do. See you next time! 

"Love Rollercoaster" - Ohio Players

(Dec. 1975/Jan. 1976, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100,

#1 R&B/#3 Cash Box/#2 Canada)

New Year's Rockin' Eve in the Shady 2022: Whoa Mellie!

COLD OPEN:

CLICK TO START THE VIDEO NOW! 

"Fire" - Ohio Players

(Jan./Feb. 1975, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100 & R&B) 

Kicking-off tonight's extravaganza, The Ohio Players, a funk band

from Dayton, and a modern remix of "Fire," one of their signature

songs, a chart-topping crossover hit in the early weeks of 1975.

Hi, I'm Grace Ryder, a 9-1-1 operator in Austin, Texas.

I'm married to a firefighter named Judd 

on the hit TV rescue drama 9-1-1: Lone Star.

 

Live, from Shady Square,

I welcome you to the

62nd annual

 New Year's

Rockin' Eve

in the Shady.

If you look up in the sky, you'll see that the wrecking ball is dropping.

Hear that sound? The crowd is cheering because it's party time.

Your regular host, Shady Seaweed, is under

the weather and couldn't be with us tonight,

but my friends and I, the newest members

of The Shady Bunch DJ team, are bound

and determined to take up the slack

and carry on with the show.

 Our lineup of grade-A music stars will

send 2022 packing and get 2023 started

with a bang. Before I turn the mic over

to the next presenter and dispatch

first responders to that "Fire" the 

Ohio Players reported, I want to

invite you to tune in my new show

 

 Grace Kelly

Rear Window

...coming soon to S-P-M-M Retrosonic Radio.

Hello, my fellow Americans! 

I'm Mellie Grant, the First Lady of the United States soon

to become the former First Lady and bitter ex-wife of the

President on the political thriller TV series Scandal.

Think I look like Jessica Whitly, Malcolm's mom

on Prodigal Son? Yeah... I get that a lot. 

Some say I have political aspirations of my own. 

I call bullcrap!

I'll be much too busy serving my country as a

Shady Bunch DJ on S-P-M-M Retrosonic Radio.

Please join me for the debut of my new show 

The 1600 Club -

Meet the Supremes

of Pennsylvania Avenue.

You'll meet the wonder women of

the White House, like me, and be

treated to the fabulous songs of

Motown's most popular artists

The Supremes. Sound like a plan?

  I admit that I'm not a happy camper

lately. On my TV series Scandal,

the "slumber chamber" of the

White House is not exactly

Tranquility Base, and I've

got a Supremes song that

speaks to my plight as

 an angry, frustrated

and bitter First Lady. 

You see, my cheating hubby, The President, is always lying around with

his mistress, Olivia Pope. He even ditched me to spend Christmas

with his Ho Ho Ho! They do it right there in the oval office,

in hotels, on trains and boat and planes - you name it. 

They're like a couple of bunny rabbits,

those two, and I'm sick of it! Make up

your mind, bucko... do you want me

and your political career, or her?

CLICK TO START VIDEO! 

Based on your track record as a skirt chaser,

I get the distinct impression that you don't

really love me. You just keep me hangin' on!

"You Keep Me Hangin' On" - The Supremes

(Nov/Dec. 1966, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100 & Cash Box & R&B)

I'm Penelope Guerrero, a starry-eyed, Kool-Aid drinking cult member

who comes to her senses and starts breaking bad and fighting back

against the Purge Night evildoers on the anthology action horror

TV series The Purge based on the film franchise of the same name.

 I'll be joining other three other courageous women

from The Purge as hostesses of the new radio show

 PURGE PARTY

on S-P-M-M. The tunes we play are guaranteed to purge the dirge

and bust the blues. Think of us as vigilante superheroes on a

mission to stamp out boring elevator music in your lifetime.

The song sample I'm presenting in this

teaser is by a Latina singing star from

Southern California's Inland Empire,  

a talented cover artist described as

"a young voice from an old soul." 

CLICK TO START

THE VIDEO NOW! 

Here's Monica Rocha doing

the Mary Wells hit-- "The One

Who Really Loves You!" 

"The One Who Really Loves You" - Mary Wells

cover by Monica Rocha (Jan. 2020) 

If you're just tuning in, this is the star-studded Shady's Place special

New Year's Rockin' Eve in the Shady 2022. 

I and other new members of The Shady Bunch are playing

samples from our upcoming S-P-M-M radio shows.

I'm Helen Pergman, Ronald's mother on David E. Kelley's

crime drama thriller TV series Big Sky.

 Ronald's a long-haul trucker.  He's not much to look at.

 I've told Ronald over and over again that he'll never amount

to anything and that no woman will ever love or want him. 

I remind him that he's a failure, just like his father.

 The good news is that he will always have me

to point out his flaws and set him straight.

Norman Ronald appreciates our little talks. Yes indeed,

there's nothing quite like a mother's love. 

Ronald and I will soon be joining

The Shady Bunch as hosts of a

new S-P-M-M radio show called

Sky King and

His Songbirds

and I've got a sample song, a 1957

romantic ballad taken directly from

the soundtrack of our series Big Sky. 

START VIDEO NOW!

Here's crooner Johnny Mathis with

his signature song, a record that

soared sky high, all the way to

number one, and lasted more

than half a year on the chart

-- "Chances Are!" 

"Chances Are" - Johnny Mathis

(Nov. 1957 through Feb.1958, highest chart pos. #1 Hot 100) 

I'm Sarah, a wife and mother

and one of the few survivors

of a disaster at sea, a fiery

 sail boat explosion in the

 2019 horror film Mary.

 It was a reversal of fortune

when Shady Del Knight

plucked me from the

water and placed me

behind the mic as

a member of his

Shady Bunch 

DJ staff.

 Mary is my younger daughter's name.

 Mary also happens to be the name of a boat my husband just had to buy. He got

it cheap... and we found out why on our family's maiden voyage to Bermuda.

 

Turned out our vessel is haunted by a witch that has a nasty habit

of killing passengers and crew whenever anyone takes her out to sea.

On my S-P-M-M radio show...

Along Comes Mary...

I'll bring you the best songs about boats, ships, sailing and the sea,

including gems of the Yacht Rock genre, a music category that,

by and large, has been neglected here at Shady's Place. 

Smooth sailing is guaranteed

as I present EZ listening rock

sounds that promote changes

in lattitudes and changes in attitudes... leaving you

feeling Mary.

I've got a sample for you,

a chart-topping song from

the hit Tom Cruise movie 

Cocktail. Like the Johnny

Mathis song Helen played,

this one cruised the chart

more than half a year

from 1988 to 1989. 

CLICK TO START

THE VIDEO NOW!

Let's all hop aboard as The Beach Boys set sail for-- "Kokomo!" 

"Kokomo" - The Beach Boys

(Nov. 1988 thru Feb. 1989, highest chart pos.

#1 Hot 100 & Cash Box, scenes from July 1988 film Cocktail) 

I'm WPC (Woman Police Constable) Jane Tennison,

star of the British TV police drama Prime Suspect 1973.

 Join me and other gorgeous ladies of law enforcement

when we officially launch our new S-P-M-M radio series

British British Swag.

We'll be playing the best Brit beat

sounds of the 1960s, 70s and

80s along with hit records by

Aussie artists like rocker and

soap actor Rick Springfield.

To end our 2022 new year's

eve spectacular, I've got a

spiffy split-screen video of

Rick (right) performing

"Love Is Alright Tonite,"

his top 20 hit from early

1982, while on the left,

the studio dancers on

American Bandstand

groove to Rick's song.

Now for Sarah, Helen,

Penelope, Mellie & Grace,

I'm Jane Tennison inviting

you to join the fun at

Shady's Place in 2023.

Happy new year!

 

"Love Is Alright Tonite" - Rick Springfield

(Jan./Feb. 1982, highest chart pos. #20 Hot 100/#27 Cash Box,

#26 Canada, studio dancers on Dec. 1981 ep. of American Bandstand)

I... Mellie Grant... do solemnly swear... that I will well and faithfully

discharge my duties as a member of The Shady Bunch

DJ team... So help me God.